Sheep happens.

Monday, June 05, 2006

Farewell.

I can't believe what is happening to people nowadays. I really have no idea. I catch no ball.

I tried to be friendly. I really did.

I offered my friendship, I tried reach out to others.
I tried to care, I tried to show concern.
I tried to be a friend.

Just like any other friend, albeit one who tries to give a damn.

Now, now. Finally I know the reason behind it, I feel betrayed. But betrayed by who?

Myself?

What did I do now. Was I in the wrong? I don't think so. What I did was totally logical. Not anything bizarre or out-of-this-world. I was merely trying to provide care and concern, I was just trying to help make life better.

I guess I made life worse huh. A non-living thing like a computer could make you happier. A non-living thing like a book can make you happier. You know you'd be better off without me around. FINE. I swear that as long as I have hair on my head I'll never take the initiative to try to talk to you, my friend. Consider it settled. You won't hear from me.

I know that you know that you'll be happier without me bothering you all the time.

Just to let you know. You once made me feel just like any other boy. Carefree, devoid of any worries, just living life as it is without any qualms. Then you suddenly transformed into something entirely dissimilar. My skies are overcast. Storms rage within me like never before.

You know, it hurts so much when I'm putting in everything just to be like any decent friend, to no avail. You know, it hurts so much when I put in my all, just to get that attitude thrown right at my face.

I'd rather people throw rocks at me. Break my jaw, crack my skull. It wouldn't hurt as much as this. You nearly killed the real me. The caring part of me. The humane side of me. Now I'm struggling, with every breath I take, to revive my true self.

Deep in my heart, you will always be the friend that you once were. The friend that I once loved.

It took a lot out of me to finally give up on this. All I can do is wish you all the best.

I'll keep praying that one fine day, you will come back to pull me out of this humongous crevasse I am in.

Always praying for you, friend. No matter how you treat me like, no matter how you find me a nuisance. I pray to God. I wish you well.

Now I have given up. It'll be fine if I go blind. I'll miss seeing, but I'll be fine. God decides what He wants to do to me. I had no choice in the first place anyway, so why not accept it.

Love is a funny thing indeed.